I am just a wife, a mom, a business woman, and a blue belt at the age of 51! I started my Brazilian Jiu Jitsu journey at the tender age of 47.
It took me 3 years to become a blue belt. But I feel like I’m getting in shape, and seeing muscles I haven’t for a while. The cardio, which I do at my own pace, is amazing. I am a business owner of 2 businesses, and am constantly creating solutions, innovating. and ‘solving problems’. Before BJJ, I felt like I was slowing down in my brain department. With BJJ, I started to feel sharper again, more focused, quicker with my brain, and yes, younger.
It all started when I took my sons who were 8 and 11 to a trial class in August of 2012. We chose Gracie Gym for its reputation with the Gracie name, bearing the tradition from the family who founded the art. They loved the idea of wrestling around, and not having to punch to get an advantage. Their confidence grew with classes, and they made lots of friends on the mat. Within a couple months they started competing, because they enjoyed it so much, and wanted to see what happened outside the gym mat. They were never pressed to compete by the instructor, but we were told they had talent, and should consider competing. Both boys had a lot of success in competing. They had losses, and they had to deal with it. I loved how the mat was already giving them lessons in life they would not otherwise have until much later. At that point, I loved watching them train, and compete. BUT, I really didn’t like how all that rolling around the mat happened. I couldn’t see myself training BJJ. Too much body contact, sweat, strangers…nope, not for me!
Fast forward a few months later, in 2013, when the professor offered a 6 week self defense course for women at the gym. Well, I was in for that! Yoga pants or leggings, and a tshirt, and I was ALL in! The first class was related to a grab and wrist lock. Very cool, easy, usable stuff. A couple lessons into it, the professor put us from the takedown to a classic ‘rape’ position. He taught us to transition from that, to an arm bar, and run…I was HOOKED! I could go from the worst possible position a woman can get herself into, to flipping the guy, breaking an ARM (bonus!) and running? I wanted MORE! How about from there putting the guy to sleep? That is when I knew I had to put on the gi, and start training for real.
How did I overcome training with men/strangers? Or the ‘rolling around’ as I saw it back at the beginning? Those first self defense classes dispelled any thought of ‘rolling around’. It’s a fight for my life, and it bears no similarity to ‘rolling around’. From outside, it looks one way. Your frame of mind inside the mat is totally different, and you’re trying to ‘defend/kill’, so they are ‘opponents’, not love interests. I found the gis are so thick, they feel like armor, and contribute to my frame of mind. My training partners are husbands, fathers, and sons who also have wives, mothers and daughters to protect. The professors can help you pick partners for you when you’re uncomfortable. I didn’t insist on training with girls after a while, because I knew it would be a guy who would potentially attack me. That is how I wanted to train. My boys think I’m so cool for training to ‘fight’. At first, my husband didn’t like seeing the ‘rolling’ around. (Refer to my comment about frame of mind on the mat, to off the mat). The fastest way to dispel his misgivings about rolling with other men, was to get HIM on the mat. Then he understood the difference himself, and loves the idea of taking classes to defend myself. If you have a husband that can’t seem to get over it, you can talk to your instructor.
The group of girls also has grown over the years, and the type of friendships formed on the mat are different than under normal circumstances. Part of it being because you are in close contact, and at your worst with not make up on, and hair all over the place!
It is truly a priceless bonding experience for my boys, my husband and I. It’s unexplainable. All I can say is, that BJJ changed our relationships, our respect for each other, and drew us closer. I will continue to train until I can no longer!
OSS!
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